So YOU are the ones who’ve been stealing my babies!
Oh no, another weirdo
Ooo, another friend!
Err, no, Mordred, that’s not a friend.
I don’t know what you’re talking about, lady. These are MY loyal minions!
I’ve been taking care of them for years! Who do you think you are to boss my babies around?
How dare you talk like that to the great overlord?! I’ll show you some manners!
Okay okay how about we calm down and talk this out like normal people?
I’ll show you not to mess with my forest!
I guess not.
I should’ve stayed at home!!
It seems we’ll have to calm her down before we can talk. Hey old man, do something!
No need to tell me twice! I still got some juice in this armor!
Oh! Oh! I wanna play too! It’ll be fun!
Rise, minions, rise!!! Mwahahaha.
Something tells me we can’t win against her with brute force…
No shit, Sherlock. Do something then, aren’t you a wizard?
I don’t know anything about nature magic, and I still haven’t recovered my spell slots since I went into the dungeons!
Ugh, no wonder you wizards are all two-pump chumps. Ceres, we need something to get those mushrooms back on our side!
To turn them… Oh!
So… There’s a technique to convert the blue caps into red caps?
Intriguing… I’ll have to study this later!
No mushrooms can resist the ancient technique of…
Ok, time out! Can we go back to the talking please? I’m sure our viewers are really confused right now.
Okay, but first you’ll have to tell me how does the big lady know the old art of druidcraft. There’s not many of us who know how to tame these little guys.
Well, beats me. Big lady, please answer the girl.
Well, Ranof The Beastmaster taught me a few secrets way back when… For some reason it didn’t work this time…
Well, it’s a very old technique. You need a bit more to tame them these days, they’re desensitized to the old arts. People used them too much… I’m impressed you know them still.
So … Are we good then?
Absolutely not! I still want you to leave my forest and my babies alone!
Actually, I’m strictly into observing the sexual act…
Shush, Elgor! So, druidgirl, who are you anyway? I thought these forests were territory of the mouse guild. You’re not even a mouse!
I’ve been guarding this forest and it’s creatures for years, I’m….
I know, I know, the armor doesn’t cover anything… But hey, neither do those tiny leaves, pal.
Can I tou– *cough* I mean… They’re sooo…
The law… Yes, the law. The old druid law demands that I follow the warrior with the largest breasts in the forest.
Hihihi, she’s talking about your boobs :p
Well that was… Unexpected.
Okay right, that’s great and all but… Why?
They represent the bounty of mother nature, symbols of fertility and beauty!
And back pain. Mostly back pain.
Shhh! Just play along! It’s our chance to just get the hell out of here and finally reach my tower. Hopefully, no more loonies pop up out of the brush.
Sigh… You guys…
Fine. I, Ophelia, blessed with… uh…
The Bountiful Bunny Boobs
The Gratuitously Gifted Gazongas?
The Biggest Bounciest Badonkadonks?
The Jugs of Jealousy?
Will you stop it! … Ahem, the…. Pillows of Pleasurable Prostration…
God, this hurts to say… I demand that you, noble druid of the fungal forest, ally with me so we can raise the mushrooms not as minions but as… as a… a family! Yes. That’s it.
Yes! Finally, someone who understands… My grandpa Ranof always thought of them as servants but they should be treated as friends!
Wait… Go back, did you say Ranof?
Yeah, that’s my ‘pa. He taught me everything I know about taking care of the forest and the creatures!
I’m sure I knew someone with that name…
He’s never told me anything about an eyeball in a suit of armor.
I’m glad that you’re getting along but can we please get out of here before some new random NPC shows up and joins the party?
Huuh, yes! Im right behind you! Let’s go, little ones.
That went better than expected.
So that means now we have more of these little guys!
I really need to take note of the political nature of the druid culture…
That’s all good and dandy but we still need to get back to the tower.
Cinder’s right! I can’t wait to see my base back to it’s former glory!
Finally! It feels like it’s been a whole year since I fell into that cave…
You mean that pointy thing over there?
We’re finally here!
Wait wait wait! Don’t end the post yet! We didn’t get around to asking, who are you anyway?
Oh, I’m Wendy, The Fungal Forest’s one and only druid! A pleasure to meet you… Now, can I please squeeze those?