War, War never changes. Except when we invented the spear. And when we discovered metallurgy. Not to mention explosives and firearms. Then we had a few big wars and everything got all chill for a while. I guess what I’m saying is that war has changed a great deal and that stupid quote was never true.

Anyhow, I think it’s time for us to finally have an attack map with full rts controls, which is pretty hype for me at least. I think Ophi is currently setting up the not-skype call right now, so let me monologue some more. Ohhh, we got a fancy pink overlay for the crown call now, fancy~. Gouda is the capital of this island, or ‘level’ if you will, and is currently garrisoned by at least Bleu, some priest hero unit, and her hunky guard.

We’ve got a small army of Mushroom themed minions, with leaf-themed mounts and beasts. We’ve finally got a blacksmith running, so we have weapons more advanced than a fist or a big stick. Last I checked, we have swords, shields, lances, and artillery pieces ready and loaded on our troops as we speak. Not to mention our bonus units from Steam Lake Village, Some Phalanxshrooms!

In terms of naval strength we have…. A single smuggling vehicle.

Damn it

Allow me to spare us Val’Mythra’s… unique accent and answer this one for you readers. With respect to the timing of our situation, the most efficient use of forge time was to armor our bigshrooms up. Compared to armoring our other unit types, they gain mere defense with regard to production time. Similarly, it is better to have 10 armored bigshrooms in terms of effective health than it is to have 6 armored and shield-wielding bigshrooms.

Also, I’m not fully convinced that bigshrooms are a unit type that can equip shields, but perhaps that’s something a more advanced unit could do. I’ll have to pull out the tech tree, and this really isn’t the time to stop paying attention. Remind me when we aren’t in the middle of a battle maybe?

Finally, our small vanguard charged forward into the gates of Gouda. Even our small initial wave outnumbers our mousey foes. They’ve barely recovered from throwing their forces at our walls, something I take with justified glee. Our mushies are causing significant damage even with basic tier one tech.

Oh yes, and we have artillery now. This is a glorious day. More indiscriminate bombardments!

All excellent options, but I think our current artillery is more classic. We’ve had these little slime explosives made from leafling extract. A single blast may not be as potent direct leafling exposure, but volume of fire and cheap production more than make up for it. Soon you’ll find their troops growing less effective under our bombardment. Still not napalm and high explosives, but I’ll take what I can get….

What an excellent idea… for our next fight. I’m pretty sure unlocking a second minion faction isn’t a quick deal.

In those tunnels, the air is still and quiet. Only the dull echoes of firing artillery and screams linger at the edge of hearing. It is damp here, holding antediluvian secrets and legends. Each step echoes, even the steps of tiny mushies.

Suddenly, Speere declared there was to be light. Thus it was so. Rather, Speere used a oft-forgotten naturally monster ability, bioluminescence. Its noble mushie companions flank him, bulwarks against the unknown. And of course, an adorable leafling is there too.

better we do not do that so…

Of course we shall. Just take a look at Mordred’s force, the main body of our offense. Legions of our gifted Phalanxshrooms. With new archershrooms and deadly slayershrooms, our combat potential has soared to an officially threatening level. Not to mention the Skellies that Mordred has summoned to bulk up our front line with some extra tankiness.

From our followers, each bead of lust builds and flows back into the hearth. It bubbles there, growing from the power our tower already held, before flowing through Larhamal with even greater force. Before Ophi’s breasts, the lusts condenses…

A sudden reveal, Bleu strikes from the shadows!

Only to be foiled at the last moment! With a matching burst of speed, our Death Knight rushes forward!

Meanwhile on Ceres’ front.

Wait, since when did Ludias have a holy bonus to damage?

A tremendous blast of force throws the giant mech backwards. Scores of tiny mushminions get tossed about, barely slowing the tumbling giant. Puritanical energies waft off Ludias, causing lingering burns to dance across the thick steel.

Deep inside Ludias’ heavy metal frame, his small powercore spurts and shudders as the last dregs of power escape it. With that, Ludias’ health falls to zero and he is broken. May he rest in the true sleep, and return to us with a slightly more resilient build that can survive…

Erm, how much damage was that?

Oh Geez, ahem. Four d10 holy damage.

The walls crack as a monster of paladin squeezes through the tight passageway. With gleaning white armor and a sword the size of a bigshroom, the hero towers over the walls of Gouda. Even the bigshrooms crack under the stress,their morale dropping perilously low.

In the quiet of the tunnels, Steve should be able to hear any foe long before they get close enough to be dangerous. Yet, something in the murk of these caves brings a moment of hesitation to his spore. Rather than a sign of a foe, it is the lack of evidence that worries him now. A flex of his connection with the tower, and he calls Ophi. 

Deep beneath the earth, within those halls, a foe most cunning lurks. For our mushroom heroes, the path is lit, clear. They must overcome that which has escaped once the net. What shall victory herald, the fall of mice or the rise of shrooms, only time shall tell…

While no wave carries them, our brave buccaneers sail with a cabin of soldiers and cunning unmatched. The constant fire of our minions forces the mice to hide behind cover, or fall to the lustinite rounds and join our followers. Beneath deck Pudding and the rest of Lupin’s crew keep the mush minions busy and in order. They have come far from the dark forests and caves they grew up in, and know little of sailing.

So it seems the lines have been drawn and the melee joined! Wherever shall our battle-hardened Swordmage go? Shall she charge heads first into the looming paladin? Circle round and corner the slippery Bleu? Or even tunnel down and support our dear Steve?

That is for YOU to decide. Seriously, Ophi is kinda busy, she can’t stop us.

For now, I think our budget can only handle so many synchronized fights, so next time join us for the battle of the tunnels. Steve, Kamusha and Speere, versus the Mouse Ninja! If we aren’t sending Hana down there, what are we doing to help the three cute ones? Should we trust the foul Kamusha’s copyright infringement to save the day? Or perhaps one of you lot are cleverer than I and have a plan.